וChelek 6
- Sins that are bayn odom l’chavayro Yom Kippur will not cleanse away. Therefore you must appease your friend even if you merely annoyed him with speech. If you think that you may owe money to someone, do not rely on your own judgement – rather display the entire truth of the matter before a posek. (ShA – MB )
- When asking for mechila you must tell your friend specifically what you did wrong to him, unless he will be embarrassed by the mention of it. (MB )
- When you are approached for mechila, do not be cruel. Forgive even malicious sins and rebellious sins. As a result, you will be forgiven from Above midda k’negged midda. (Rama – ShaH8)
- In the following cases you do not have to forgive him: a) You intend for the benefit of the requester – that he should subdue his heart not to continue his sins.
- You intend for your own benefit – that forgiving him will cause you harm.
- He defamed you. Even so, the humble way is to forgive him also for this. (Rama – MB , )
- If you offended someone and then he died, you can still get forgiven. Go to his grave (or send a shaliach) with a minyan and beg for forgiveness. Detail the sin and the other men will say “mochul loch” three times. (ShA – MB , )
- If you cursed a person after he died, ask him for mechila at the location of the offense. (MB )
- The minhag is for anyone of mitzva age to dunk in a mikva and receive malkos any time Erev Yom Kippur. (ShA – MB )
- It is good to dunk before the viduy of Mincha. Others dunk after the final meal just before the onset of Yom Kippur. (MB )
- Even if you are still tahor from the mikva of Erev Rosh Hashona, dunk three times again now. Some chassidim dunk 39 times. (MB – BaH8)
- You should wash yourself to remove any chatzitza before dunking. (MB )
- If dunking disturbs you, you can pour 9 kabin of water on yourself. See earlier in Siman 88. (Rama – MB )